February 1st: Robotics Is A Joke

Today was bad.

Don't let the mentors read this. This is a rant unless you're interested. A brain dump. I'll probably write a formal address later.

Robotics is actually a joke. I spend 20+ hours a week twiddling my goddamn thumbs. I did not sign up for this. I signed up as "team captain" (if you can even call it a role) because I want to help the rest of my members learn and do something on a good schedule. To truly make "STEM education accessible for all." to get people excited at the thought of building robots, for us to impact our community by providing the STEM education to those excited robotics kids. However, throughout this entire year, even the pre-season, I haven't such opportunities. No leadership opportunities to do anything. Compared to last year, I have not had the environment to do so. I have not been enabled to do what I wanted to do. I know I certainly have not learned anything new. If anything, I feel like I've taken steps back compared to last year. Last year I did so much stuff, I wrote so much software for this team and it was pretty useful. Last year, I made a curriculum and taught it, and while I might've not been present always, I made sure to guide people through their software. I was happy in robotics last year

I thought I would've been enabled by my team and mentors to lead my team. I thought I would've had these opportunities reserved for me, being "team captain" and all. Yet, I have not been supported in my endeavors. My attempts of project management, leading the other leads, getting everyone on the same track have not been supported. And I am fed up. Our team is all over the damn place and while I know I CAN help the cause, I do not have the support to do so.

Thus, I have fallen out of love for robotics. I definitely have more to say but I'm just dumping my brain out. Like I said earlier, I'll formalize what I mean later. I want to continue to love robotics but the space I'm in isn't conducive to my interest.

Thanks for reading,
Issac